Archive for the ‘What the F%$k?’ Category


Reason #1: Crazy ass Priest

November 18, 2008

Apparently Rev. Jay Scott Newman’s crazy ass refuses to give communion to those who have not repented if they voted for Barack Obama.  Ummm, are you fucking serious? Crazy individuals with deranged notions are not necessarily unique…. even the fact that he is a priest is not particularly surprising as they are not immune to dementia any more so than normal people.  However, what is surprising is that 90% of his congregation agrees.  Supposedly the priest and his congregations sentiments are centered around anti-abortion politics…….but, I smell a rat.

Greenville, North Carolina is my first official pick for my new list in progress “Cities and Towns of the USA unfriendly to Negroes”.


“Your the Emblem Of, the Land I love…blahblahBLAHblahblahBLAHBLAHBLAAAAH…”

October 5, 2007

As if we all needed another reason not to watch FOX news and Cavuto specifically. What could possibly be more important than a discussion on flag pins at a time like this?


A doctor in the works??

March 15, 2007

………2 years of frustration, trying to decide if was worth it……1 application to 1 school….. 1 interview……. Ladies and Gentlemen, I have officially been accepted medical school and will begin in July ….. barring that some huge error has not been made.

……I now believe in Santa Claus again. And the Easter Bunny.


9/11: The Death Of A Lie and Greedy Grief

September 11, 2006

As I watched the smoke plume from the pentagon that day I grew the fuck up. In a moment I realized how much I had been lied to, and how my cushy suburban upbringing was the social equivalent of child abuse because it had made me lazy. Lazy because I was all too willing to accept what I was told, what I read, and what I watched in the news. 9/11/01 was the day I grew up and out of my childish notions that believed my school teachers who preached that America would never be attacked on it’s soil. As the hot flames licked the skies and left their ashen fingerprints I grew up that day because the lie died, as it should have died for everyone that day. The lie made us feel safe, as if there really is such a thing. The lie made us feel like we didn’t have to pay attention to the rest of the world because we were powerful and rich and no one would dare attack us. I didn’t lose anyone I knew that day in the smoke so I can’t claim any particularly moving 9/11 story. I have no harrowing tale about narrowly escaping death, or having just dropped a loved one off at the pentagon for work. I have no story except that the smell of the fire sent the lie up in smoke for me that day.

Jill at Feministe hits the nail right on the head. I couldn’t have said this any better. I hate the stories. I hate the “where were you on 9/11?” exchange as if it’s a competition. These stories are usually by people who were no where near the attacks in order to conjure up some grief. Greedy greevers. I hate that it was twisted to justify a sorry ass war on a country that had nothing to do with 9/11 and I hate all the people who are just now realizing that. I hate how fuckers around the country started waving American flags all over the place and were willing to give the most powerful fucker on the face of the planet carte blanche to reek havoc on whoever they damn well please. I hate the media spins and how they play, and replay the same clips over and over again that fuel the misplaced patriotism of so many. I hate the movies. I hate the documentaries. I hate the supposed controversy over the tilt of those damn movies. Do we really need to have this shit reenacted? Could we not live without the created dramatic dialogue and a minute by minute breakdown of all the fucked up shit that led to that day in 2001? Is it absolutely necessary for every one in the country to act as voyeurs to the pain of people who actually lost someone tangible that day?

I am still trying to understand this supposed “collective grief”. Supposedly, we all lost something that day. Yea we lost our imperialistic sense of immunity. Collectively as a country we all lost our sense of security, but that was a lie anyway. So forgive me if I am not exactly moved by the sentiment of people who couldn’t sleep that night, shed tears, or moved about their lives uneasy for a while. Uneasy? Try worrying about getting blown the fuck up every day you take the subway. Try walking and driving past the building gravesites as part of daily life. Try actually losing someone when all they did was go to work. I’m not sorry that I don’t give a damn about you mourning the lost of your sense of security, because you too were just as foolish as I to believe that you ever had it to begin with. I am not sorry your world was rocked, this day 5 years ago was evidence that all of our worlds needed to be rocked. So please put your flags and your misguided foolish patriotism back in storage, because if you really wanted to show an act of national solidarity and true patriotism you would still be too angry to even look at a flag today.


So Apparently Sunday School Teachers Are A Threat To Jesus As Well……

August 21, 2006

When Mary Lambert, who has taught Sunday school for 54 years is fired for having a vagina I begin to be convinced that the world might indeed be coming to an end. Now see this is why my hellish nightmares consist of Pat Robertson taking over humanity versus satan…..(or are they the same thing? hmmm). Apparently it isn’t enough to be Christian and love Jesus in order to teach about Jesus…….you must also have a penis like Jesus in order to fully qualify. The church board voted UNANIMOUSLY to dismiss her on the grounds that her vagina did not make the cut and they sent her a letter telling her such and quoting the bible as backup.

The letter quotes 1 Timothy 2:11 -14 of the New Testament: “A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent. For Adam was formed first, then Eve. And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner.”

Hmmm, to learn in quietness and full submission. Is it just me, or do I hear the echos of Ike Turner smacking the hell outta Tina screaming “Sing the song like I wrote it Ana Mae!!!”? I swear women kind just cannot seem to pay enough for the fairytale of Adam and Eve.  Never in the history has a fable been solely responsible for the oppression, humiliation, and degradation of an entire gender.  While we are at it, correct me if I am wrong, but the way I remember the creation story Adam was decieved and was just as much as the sinner…… she gave him the apple, he is the fool who bit it.  Furthermore, if man is so easily deceived by a lie, how does that make him more fit to teach and influence the minds of others in the way of the Lord? Seems to me that a fool should never guide the mind of babes.  I first caught wind of this story on World News Tonight where they interviewed the pastor Tim Labouf saying that their church strictly adheres to the “special” and very specific roles God has laid out in the bible. He went on too say that it isn’t exclusion because there are other roles for women in the church, just not preaching ……teaching …….leading …….speaking……breathing heavy, etc.

Herein lies the fundamental reason I turned away from “Christianity” (because apparently there are 500 different versions……just pick the one that works for you). How can I embrace a religion with fundamental principles that hate my vagina and make it clear that my vagina will always be a second class citizen? Who can truly find fault with a woman teaching Sunday school class purely because of some obscure archaic bible verse? Screw somebody’s garbage about a woman’s “special” place, there is no such thing as seperate but equal. We all know what the deal is…….. men rule the roost…… women shut up, stay in your place and provide the casserole. Reminds me of segregationist insisting that there is merely a natural order to things supported by bible versuses that point to the notion that races should be seperated. Funny though, us colored folk was just sho nuff tired of whistlin dixie in the back of the bus…..even though it was our ‘”special” place. Not exclusion…..just “special”.

Tim LaBouf, who is also a member of the Watertown City Council, did not respond to repeated attempts for comment.

So, this man was actually elected to sit on a city council?….Are you telling me that this man has the ability to not only oppress vaginas inside his church…..but in the entire city as well? Who gave this man power? Who wasn’t paying attention?!! How do things like this occur Amerikkka?!!!! Who are the people voting for these neanderthal politicians? This nonsense deserves a new category, because crazy Christians scare the hell out of me.